Well, the letter I've been expecting for a while finally arrived today. Our foreclosure notice. It gives us a few pointless options, usually leading to our immediate payment of our past due amount. Well, if I could pay that, I would have never fallen into foreclosure in the first place. I wish we could just start with a $0 past due balance and maybe somehow I could make my payments every month. I'm hoping my business will pick up soon, but even if that happened, we would still be unable to catch up. It doesn't help that our mortgage is through the USDA, which happens to be the WORST lender to try to negotiate with because they are part of the government. So, we are up the creek without a paddle, so to speak.
Surprisingly, I didn't break down and cry when the letter came. I just feel numb. I guess cuz I expected it to come. Or maybe cuz I cried myself out yesterday.

But my little girls will be home either late tonight (not likely) or tomorrow evening! I have missed them so much and I'm glad they are coming home. Then later this week I will make the drive to Dallas to get my older girls and everyone will be home!! I really want to take them all somewhere, like the beach or to a shallow river, but the lack of money is again at fault for keeping us home and bored.

I still have a dream of being rich one day! I don't even care if it's not "filthy rich"; I just want enough to pay all our bills every month, have enough left over for enough groceries and a few extras, take my kids on a vacation once or twice a year (even just a short overnight road trip.) Is that really too much to dream for? It's just the American dream, I guess.